My husband is the best dad on the planet, and though it’s hard to believe he is this perfect, it’s true! He is always patient and calm — he never raises his voice or shows any negative emotions when it comes to the kids. In fact, when they get upset he always gently distracts them with something funny or silly to change their moods.
This used to be a foolproof scenario: distract and diffuse. In the past, the kids would forget all about what they were upset about and go happily on their way back to playing and enjoying the day.
However, we are discovering that now that they are a little older, distraction isn’t working so well anymore. In fact, one of my daughters gets quite irritated when my husband tries to ruin her perfectly good mad. She wants to be mad and she doesn’t appreciate him trying to pull her out of it.
I always try to relate my children’s experiences to my own, and on this one, I can totally appreciate her point of view. Sometimes I, too, just want to stew a little and be perfectly happy with my mad. In fact, I’m pretty sure a good mad helps me feel better in the long run. It shows conviction and determination. If I’m mad, there is a thoroughly good reason and if you can sway me out of my mad easily, then the issue must not have been that important. Right?
So, as my children mature and need different parenting strategies than they needed during the scraped-knee phase of life, we learn once again, we must change and adapt to their needs as quickly as they change shoe sizes. And just sometimes, staying out of their way and letting them work through a mad of their own, is precisely the right way to go.
Live the moment,